Giving and receiving, and the challenge of asking

Giving and receiving… And in between, asking; giving – asking – receiving. A trinity where I guess we need some sort of balance. I know I would probably feel a lot better if I had more balance, and that is somewhat of a struggle for me.

I've always been the one to give of my time, my energy, my love/support/advice/help, and it is always a gift given freely. Time and time again, I find myself volunteering to help or give: "do you need…?", "do you want me to…?" That is second nature for me. And of course, if someone asks, my answer is usually Yes. Of course. Anything you need. I'm always seeking to meet other people's needs, whether explicitly expressed or perceived. Quite often, I'm right in what I perceive; even though it may not be what the person in question wants. Ah, the power of the Crone.
And I like to give, to guide, to see someone find her/his answers or gain foothold. It makes me happy, it energises me. But… I feel like I rarely get the same in return. Only rarely have I experienced that people volunteer or offer to help or give me something out of the blue. Because they want to. And when they do, I tend to feel almost guilty and that I have to or should "make it worth it". Like I still can't understand why anyone would want to be there for me. (Which is quite true, come to think about it.)
I've been wondering about this lately, as I've realised that the things I need are pretty much the ones I give so freely. Who can I turn to? How do I even ask?

More than once I've been told that I'm a difficult person to help and that I shut people out. Perhaps they try to give, but in a way that I don't notice or understand, and then give up when I fail to notice or receive "in the right way", whatever that is. I'm not used to people giving generously of themselves, not to me anyway; and it's apparently not something that changes just like that, and being accused of shutting people out when I really am learning and changing certainly doesn't help. It just makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong and I hesitate even more to open myself to receiving.

Asking for something, anything, is almost ridiculously hard. It's like I only dare to ask for something if I know the person I'm asking is happy and satisfied, which just rarely happens. People have their own needs and problems and life issues; it's so much easier to listen to them than to ask for something when I know that they have needs. And yes, I do give others' needs a higher priority than mine. So there is an imbalance; I happily give and get frustrated when I don't know where to turn for my needs, and even more frustrated (and sad) whenever I am told that I shut people out. What if I'm not shutting you out, but just don't know how to invite you in? Or think that you don't want to come in?

And I know that this is a problem that I'm entirely responsible for. It's up to me to ask, because most people won't just understand what I need and volunteer to give it, or knock on my door and ask to be let in.
How do you go from being a giver, to being a giver-and-receiver?